Missing Dad

This week has been the first time my sister has returned to New York since our dad died.  I've been trying to do things with her she never got to do in all the times she came in to visit him.

I know she is having a good time, but there still is that void.  She misses his demands, his phone calls and his constant worrying.  I do too, but I guess because I am here it has gotten a little easier.

The End Seemed So Far Away

I knew the end was coming but I just didn't think it would be as soon as it was.

The aide said she would need laundry detergent, not right away, but soon.  I went to BJ's immediately and bought a container that would wash 120 loads.  It is now in my basement unopened.

Dad stopped eating and was living on Ensure.  I bought two huge cases.  I'm glad the aide drinks them so they won't go to waste.  She said he liked pudding.  I bought a pack of 18.  It is in my refrigerator now.  The apple sauce and baby carrots are in the temple food bank. knew he was suffering and I wanted his pain to end.  

I just didn't realize it would actually happen.